I put all three WET muddy dogs in the car (yes...it has been raining, too!) and spent an hour vaccuuming and scrubbing...Thank Goodness for leather seats in the van which will wipe clean - in theory, at least.
The timing was perfect: I was just finishing when the kids came home from school. I would not let them inside, but directed them to the Mom-Mobile (our Sienna mini-van), grabbed my purse and off we all went to get McD*nald's strawberry-banana smoothies with whipped cream... YUMMMMMMMMMM. We aimlessly drove around until our smoothies were gone and my floors might be dried. It was worth blowing the gas ($3.99 a gallon here folks!) driving around town.
Manny is still hospitalized and will remain there for quite some time. We have not been asked to visit him by either the hospital or social worker and have not received any calls from him. Our understanding is he will go to residential and will stabilize there for some time before they try family living again for this guy. So very sad.
James goes home to Mom this weekend for his first unsupervised weekend visit with his Mom. Which is great and all - especially since it is Mother's Day weekend. However, I hope his brothers are all crashing somewhere else this weekend. James' Brother was recently in the paper for yet another arrest. This time a handgun and crack and tools of burglary...nice.
Two weeks ago James shows up with a new ipod nano...and several weeks prior to that he has an ipod touch (which he claims he traded for his little ipod...All five of his "explanations" are hinky and don't make any sense. This past weekend, I found a quart size zip lock baggie just sitting behind James' alarm clock with $310.25 in it. Large bills...rolled coins with a strange bank account # on them.....Hmmmm. I didn't even bother asking where he got the money. We would just get a vacant, confused, disjointed, nonsensical answer...followed with "I dunno..."
With the advice of a Social Worker, I just took the money and am waiting to see what he says about it...Hasn't said squat since Sunday when I scooped it. His Social Worker was supposed to come here today to deal with it - but went home sick and has called and rescheduled for tomorrow.
Whatever...
My vacuum quit sucking too so I got a Dyson. It sucks good. So far anyway. Hope the weekend visit for James goes well and that Manny is able to somewhat stabilize.
ReplyDeletep.s. i didn't play off your title, promise. just a funny coincidence.
Dyson baby, dyson. Before that sucker, all of our vacuums died after a year- or less.
ReplyDeleteI saw the Dyson was the "deal of the day" at Targhey.com.
ReplyDeleteThat's all the advice about sucking you're gonna get from this lesbian ;o
I'd like to challenge you to do something that may be some work but is likely to have a huge impact on whether Manny grows up to be a productive vs. destructive member of society. I'm not gonna suggest that you take him into your home again, because that's just too much trauma for you and your other boys. What I suggest is that you visit him every 2 weeks or so, like a mentor / 'big sister', and keep it up for as long as you can manage. This would keep you and your other kids safe and minimize the emotional drain on you. However, it could still make a big difference to the kid, for two reasons.
ReplyDeleteFirst, he probably doesn't understand that his repeated rejections aren't because people generally suck (like vacuums) and don't care, or because he's innately unlovable. Rather, they're the result of specific behaviors, and if he learns to control those behaviors he'll be able to get the love he needs. Since you have a rep for being good with crazy teen boys, and since he's got an emotional connection to you, you might be able, with patience, to get that message across.
Second, what I've seen from reading blogs by aged out foster kids is that the instability and repeated rejection they go through is just as psychologically harmful as the abuse. If you could be a stable, reliable part of this kid's life (keeping within the boundaries that are comfortable for you of course), it might have a big effect on how he turns out in the long term.
Hey! Just wanted to say 'hi' and thanks for the message you posted on my blog. Two vacuums....great idea. And Happy Mothers day to both of you! I hope it is a great day for you.
ReplyDeletedirt devils DON'T suck. we have a hoover. love it. linked you with photos of the finished april wall hanging complete with the green/blue floral print you sent. http://peaceinpuzzles.blogspot.com/2011/05/this-and-that.html
ReplyDeleteand thanks for the awesome shirt. I totally wore it to church yesterday with a cute skirt and got LOTS of comments. You were thought of and loved much yesterday, just wearing it. It was like wearing a hug! xxooxxooxxoo